My Secrets Become Your Truth
by Janeway1390
Summary: It takes her a moment to find her voice. This moment between them is about as honest and real as they've had in awhile.


She doesn't sleep much anymore. She spends her nights going over case files from when she was away and trying to figure out what the hell the machine is.

Then there's the other reason. If Olivia is honest with herself (she rarely is these days) then she'd admit the real reason she doesn't sleep has nothing to do with work.

It's because of him. Because he didn't know she was gone, because _none_ of them knew she was gone.

It weighs heavy on her mind, even heavier on her heart.

So she throws herself into her work like she always does. Olivia made a promise to a friend to save both worlds and she intends to honor it.

* * *

She rarely goes to the lab and when she does it's for as little time as possible.

Today she was called in by Astrid to check out Walter's latest discovery.

"Agent Dunham! It's good to see you again," Walter says as she walks in. It's as if he forgot he saw her at the crime scene earlier. He's elbow deep in a body, drinking some green concoction out of one of those beer hats. She doesn't want to know.

Olivia tries not to scan the room for Peter, but it's an instinct she can't help.

She spots him out of the corner of her eye. He's analyzing what she assumes to be blood samples and attempting (and failing) to act like he didn't notice her. This dance they're doing doesn't alleviate the tension, but it saves them from having to talk. She can't decide if she's thankful or annoyed by it.

Walter updates her on the body and is giddy about his findings. At some point in his ramblings Peter moved to stand next to her, allowing a safe distance between them. Despite the space his presence sends tingles over her body.

Peter rolled his eyes as Walter finished and sent a smile her way, but Olivia was already halfway to the door.

* * *

It's one of their easier cases and it's solved within the day. Olivia goes home to her apartment and continues the ritual of packing her life into boxes.

She can't stay here. The memories seep out of the walls, threatening to choke her. Most of her things are going to Goodwill, including the majority of her wardrobe, so she can rebuild her life without the constant reminder of the other her. Olivia wants to burn the bed.

The call comes around midnight. Broyles apologizes for the late hour. She doesn't tell him she's been up all night sorting through her closet, indulging in a few shots of whiskey.

There's been another incident involving shapeshifters. He gives her the details and she hangs up to dial the Bishops. With the impending universe destruction looming over their heads anything related to Walternate has been treated priority one. When he switched Olivia with her alternate, he might as well have drawn lines in the sand. Now it felt as if the first bomb would drop at any moment.

They were close to something, Olivia could feel it. Any case could offer them a way to save the world. Both of them.

There's a hint of surprise when Peter picks up the phone. She tells him to be ready in twenty minutes. He doesn't protest.

* * *

She's hanging out of the side of the passenger window trying to shoot the shapeshifter while Peter drives.

They weren't able to get to him before he stole a hard drive from a physics professor. Now they're chasing him down a secluded dirt road to nowhere. Peter swerves to dodge an oncoming bullet causing her to slip farther out the window. She shoots him a look and he mumbles an apology.

Olivia's able to shoot the shapeshifter's tires and tries to get a shot off while the car skids to a stop. She misses the other Olivia's accuracy. She remembers how easy it was for her to hit an impossible shot, but those skills faded with the rest of her doppelganger's memories.

She follows when he gets out of the car. It takes her twenty steps and three shots to take him down and all she can think about is that the other her could have taken him out with one.

One shot or three, he's dead just the same.

"You okay?" Peter asks from behind her.

"Yeah. You?"

He nods and kneels down to pick up the hard drive.

"Nice driving."

He looks at her for a moment before he recognizes her teasing tone and laughs lightly. She lets the corners of her mouth turn up in the ghost of a smile.

* * *

It's late by the time they make it to the airport. The terminal is deserted save for the few people catching red-eyes.

She finds an abandoned corner and sits facing the windows. The only light comes from the faint flicker of planes taking off from the runway. It's the first time in weeks that Olivia has just sat. No laptop, no files, no boxes of things that didn't feel like hers anymore.

Every part of her was exhausted. She rested her elbows on her knees and cradled her head in her hands. In moments like this (which were becoming more frequent), Olivia wished she never became an FBI agent or at least that she and John ignored their phones the night Flight 627 landed, failing to set into motions events that led her here.

Peter clears his throat and she looks up to see him holding out a cup of coffee. She must really be exhausted if she didn't hear him approach. She took the cup with a nod of thanks. He stood there not knowing if he should stay or leave her be.

"You can sit if you'd like," she said taking a sip of the warm liquid.

Silence stretches on and Olivia's surprised it's not as awkward as she's come to expect.

"Do you ever wonder how the Hell we got here?"

"Every single day," he replies without humor or sarcasm.

Olivia looks at him, noticing his slumped shoulders and tired eyes. Maybe he wasn't sleeping much either. She wants to say something to him, to relive his stress, to make it okay again, but she's not over everything enough to fully forgive him yet.

"I'm sorry," she offers instead.

"For what?"

"A lot of things, but mostly that I didn't tell you about your glimmer when I first found out. Maybe if I had I would have saved us all a lot of trouble."

"You knew I'd take it badly and run. You needed me to stay."

_You belong with me. _The words echo in her mind. She knows he means that she needed him for more than that, but they both knew the weight the words held.

"Still," she said. "You told me about . . . about her and must have had an idea of how it would turn out."

"Na einai kalitero anthropo apo ton patera tou," he notes the instant recognition in her eyes and her nod of understanding. "And I needed you to stay too. I knew the longer I waited to tell you, the farther away you'd retreat. I don't want there to be secrets between us, even if the truth makes you hate me."

It takes her a moment to find her voice. This moment between them is about as honest and real as they've had in awhile.

"I don't hate you, Peter. I just . . . you were my only tether to reality over there. When I came back not only did I lose you, but I lost that too. Now I'm just flailing trying to hang onto whatever sanity I have left."

"I'm still here, you know. I can still be that for you."

"Maybe. Maybe one day you can."

It's as close as they'll get to admitting their feelings. Olivia's not ready to knock down her walls just yet, but she knows that she still needs him. They can't afford to be out of sync when the fate of universes hangs in the balance between them.

It's a start though. After all, they crossed universes for each other. If that's not real love, then she doesn't know what is.


End file.
